When I was little I came up with a crazy-not-so-crazy notion. Something which kiddies with their daring and sometimes giggly imaginations often do. As a 4 year old, I thought that people saw a different me than the one I saw in the mirror. Of course, I told myself that clearly all the other small people would see a far prettier version from what I saw. That thought has stuck with me (I mean that thought that I thought – gosh if only I believed this could be true! Could you imagine, I would practically be floating on a cloud).
Yes, this thought might have been fanciful. Perhaps you could even say that it was more fantasy than reality. STOP. Let the thought sink in for a minute. Then ask yourself, is it really all those things?
If you described yourself and then someone else did (whether that be your chums or your families), would you say the same things? Err no, not likely. In fact you will probably find that you have either done one of the following or more:
1. 1. Made an array of umm and err’s to make it sound as if you are coming up with something… buuut you can’t really think of how to ‘start’.
2. Spotted features – I have a nose
3. Frowned at yourself in an attempted Harry Potter move to become (waves wand) Invisiblo.
4. Labelled yourself as something or other i.e. tall – lanky – short – stubby and the list goes on and on.
But, something that we know we all have done is pick out the negatives first or perhaps just dumped them all on ourselves. Like how it is easier to draw the negative line than the crossed plus sign. We take the easier way out. May be we don’t even want to say nice things about ourselves, because we feels it crosses that barrier between confident and just plain obsessed with yourself. But, you are not.
For whatever reason the way the world works is that good things always seem to be much harder. Whether that be trying to attempt a non-chocolate diet and pile on the veg or trying to push out a few positive words. It just seems that the bad thoughts seem to come more easily to us. However what you need to remember is that the good is always more rewarding.
The great thing is this. I wouldn’t see you the same way as you would and vice versa. Think of it this way. Those nasty nipping thoughts you told yourself are still just thoughts. Like I have realised, just because you think something doesn’t make it true.
It’s like today when the cooking didn’t go my way. I’m a failure. Just as black and white as that. I can’t cook. I can’t do this. And suddenly your mind is not yours anymore. Why do I do this? Because I always feel as if I have to do things perfectly. If I don’t, I have failed.
I know. I know. This is not true. And that is my point. It also leads to my next tip which is to fight back. Slap that one crappy thought with a better one. I’m not a failure, because I still managed to cook a nice meal…
Now is the time to get in the ring with your thoughts. Stop taking the blows on your face, learn how to block, dodge and thought punch your way to the winning bell.