#1 Built in performance scanner
I swear it’s like I have this built-in scanner. Every time I talk to someone, which lets face it is not a lot. It’s like my mind is some weird sci-fi computer that scans me whoosh in waves from my head to toe. Do I look awkward? I’m I slouching? Am I in a weird position? I can’t remember all the thoughts, but you get the drill.
#2 Like Edward Cullen I can read minds
Sorry for the Twilight simile. I know, I know mega cheese. But, it was either that or the mystic Meg option. Yep I’ve talked about this one before. We like to think we know what everyone is thinking of us. But, of course there only thinking what we’re really thinking, right? Ugh how socially awkward is she/he…
#3 Over thinker, ain’t that an understatement
The word overdrive doesn’t even put a dint into social anxiety ( I unexpectedly just wrote a pun). Anyway, you can ensure that I will come up with every scenario. Mainly consisting of the ones with some tragedy where I utterly humiliate myself just in hundreds of different ways.
Yep whether it’s practicing made up conversations in my head, I think about EVERYTHING. Way too much!
#4 No really I’m allergic to people
Seriously I am. If could use that excuse I would! But, when I’m in a social situation people other than my familia a red alert goes off in my head.
#5 My worst fear is judgement
Don’t even get me started on this one. You don’t need me to tell you where this one is going.
#6 The biggie: avoiding social situations
I would love to hang out with someone without wanting to run away or make excuses why I can’t go. I don’t want to have to stay away from social situations like the plague. I just want to have what others do. To do things and not over think what I say, or the way my body is or how much every nerve in my body is telling me to run.
I want to be free.
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